Penis, Porn and Politics

Penis, Porn and Politics: this year Hookie awards

Yeah I know I you looked at the title and was like what does politics have to to with porn. You be surprised how much electioneering goes on. Let's call a spade a spade , a hooker a hooker and a dick a dick. Yeah I know it sounds confusing but it really isn't follow along. 

Ok so this year I went to my second adult industry awards and I was like so stoked that two wonderful men Boomer Banks and Rocco Steele were up for some major awards in the adult service industry. These two men are funny, smart , kind, sassy, sexy and down right delicious. 

I am really good when it comes to picking winners when it comes to award shows. So in my little fat heart I knew these men will sweep their respective categories. So let me set the  mood .  

The awards were held at BPM the club connected to the OUT hotel. Dimly lit but very tasteful done. It's kind of funny they started on CFT( Color Folk Timezone ). So once we started Miss Alaska Thunderfuck 5000 was the hottest with the mostest. 

Ok so once the opening song and dance number with jokes thorn in was done. They started right away. The first couple of categories I was not too surprised because I did not vote for them but when we got to Best Porn Star Escort  I knew as a betting woman Boomer should have won. When they announce the winner Aleks Buldocek, I was like WTF who is this. I was upset I am not gonna front. So then we moved on to Best Top like I said I had my money set on Rocco winning but when they called Austin's name I was deflated. Yes I have watched Austin work for Randy Blue but he is not Big Daddy. There is something about Rocco that makes you want to take him like a slut in heat.  Duncan Black won best bottom that was cool. 

The next category was Best Body again if I had a line to a bookie in Vegas I was laying odds that Sean Zeveran would have won. But some guy name Kurtis Wolfe, I mean I saw him and hell no he does not have the body Sean has. So I'm like something ain't right ok I kept  sitting back  I did not vote for the best bear/Cub but the winners were Will Foster and Ted Byrns . 

I did not vote for the fetish kink category the winner was Brian Bonds. Now we get to Best Dress/Style and yes I was like a cheer leader when they called Boomer's name. The man does have one fucking hell of a fashion sense. I say I want him to give me the Miss Fame makeover.  So I was Uber happy for Bacon Bits. 

Best Ass category again I was pulling for Sean like hooker in hunts point. But when the named Tyson Tyler, I was like DaFuck, really Sean has the type of ass that if you bounce a quarter off it you get back a dollar. When Mr. Tyler josh owed the world his ass I was like I got a better rounder ass and I'm a female. 

Then we get to Best Cock and shit I was like Big Daddy better when this cause my inner Shaquetta was gonna come out. When they named Rocco for the award I was happy for him. I mean hell that's not a cock he has thats  a blue whale. I mean good gravy you will a whole lot of crisco to take that cock. Moving along  the next category was Massage the winner was Elijah Wood. 

The next category was Best Fantasy Boyfriend I vote my wide ass off for Killian James, he should have won but Nooo the winner was Mike De Marko, have no clue maybe I'm not all that knowledgable. But I felt so bad for Killian why cause he was sitting across from me. 

Ok now we got to the Best Daddy category like I keep telling folks I may be fat I may be ugly but I ain't stupid . That awards should have went to Rocco hands down and some guy name Chris Roberts won. Who the hell is he I mean Rocco makes you want to drop and say yes Big Daddy, anything Big Daddy and scream harder Big Daddy. I was sorely disappointed 

Best social media should have been Boomer no fucking question about it. But the winner was a Leo Sweetwood Best website went to Nick Sterling and I voted for Nick he is a cutie and then we got to the coup de grace Mr. international Escort 2015 I knew that if Rocco did not when this I was truly gonna get ugly but in the end Big Daddy Rocco Steele was crowned Mr. international 2015.

Now let's get down to the nitty gritty the folks who should have sweep their respective categories didn't and I could not figure out why. I mean Sean, Rocco and Boomer are very popular and have one hell of a fucking following. So I could not get it until a little birdie said favorites had to beat out fan favorites. Politics do not belong if you are asking for fans to vote the. Let it be honest voting not the back room bullshit like we see in our everyday politicians. 

Don't get me wrong RentBoy dot come but on one hell of a show. But next year let it be honest voting and winning by the fans and not the powers to be.  Would I go again hell yeah to support Big Daddy and Bacon Bits. 

I did get to meet Jesse Jackman and Dirk Cabler OMG they are the most awesomest and sweet Jeebus is Jesse tall as heck. Damn Dirk looks yummy in leather. 

To Rocco and Boomer you guys are the best and no matter what are winners in everything yall do. #Boober #infinitlove #loveisyourreligion #BigDaddy #Baconlvr